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7 MOST DIFFICULT ASPECTS OF A FATHER AND SON RELATIONSHIP – Bishop Irabor Wisdom.

7 MOST DIFFICULT ASPECTS OF A FATHER AND SON RELATIONSHIP – Bishop Irabor Wisdom.

The FATHER and SON relationship is a BLESSING, if only you UNDERSTAND the RULES of ENGAGEMENT.

Before you CALL ANYONE your FATHER, please check your ABILITY to MANAGE these SEVEN DIFFICULT AREAS.

SONS who are not MATURED will always have PROBLEMS in these areas of ENGAGEMENTS.

1. WHEN YOU SEE YOUR GENUINE FATHER RELATING WITH THE SAME PERSON YOU AVOIDED BECAUSE YOU KNOW HE IS VERY FAKE AND ‘DIRTY’:

You are the one that SEES that PERSON as being FAKE. 

YOUR FATHER is more MATURED THAN YOU, he knows HIMSELF is WEAK IN ONE AREA OF LIFE. 

You are also WEAK in your own area of WEAKNESS. 

And that PERSON is also WEAK in his own way. 

The only problem with that person you call FAKE is that, he RELATES with SO MANY PEOPLE in the SAME WAY. 

There are things you don’t do with more than 2 or 3 people in this life. 

When COVENANT BROTHERS become TOO MANY, IT WILL BECOME COVENANT BREAKERS. 

Most PEOPLE STEAL, but it is THE ONE that is CAUGHT that is called a THIEF. 

But when you are GENUINE and you are VERY CONVINCED that this PERSON IS FAKE and NOT JUST WEAK, and the FATHER YOU SEE AS GENUINE is now INVITING HIM or PREACHING for him, it becomes a CHALLENGE to MANAGE. 

If YOU ARE NOT MATURED in HANDLING this issue, YOU WILL BE OFFENDED.

But please understand, there is a WORLD of difference between FAKENESS and WEAKNESS.

Every PASTOR on EARTH is WEAK in ONE AREA OF LIFE.

But not ALL PASTORS are FAKE.

I can relate with a WEAK PASTOR, Because I am also WEAK.

But I can’t relate with a FAKE.

You can still spend a WEAK NAIRA NOTE, that was MISTAKENLY THROWN into your REFUSE BIN for DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS and YEARS. 

But you can’t SPEND A FAKE ONE, you can be CAUGHT and ARRESTED.

If you CHECK NIGERIAN PREACHERS very well, ALL GENUINE PASTORS ARE CONNECTED DIRECTLY or INDIRECTLY to SOMEONE you think is FAKE.

For example:

PASTOR 1 is GENUINE, so he doesn’t relate with PASTOR 2 that he CALLS FAKE, but relates very well with PASTOR 3 that is the FRIEND of PASTOR 2 that is FAKE, according to PASTOR 1. 

Then PASTORS 4, 5 and 6 you call FALSE PROPHETS, are the TRUE SONS of PASTOR 1 THAT is very GENUINE. 

You can see the CONNECTION and the CONFUSION.

What will you do, if your Father host the very Person you consider to be FAKE? will you ATTEND the MEETING or AVOID the MEETING?

Will you also DISCONNECT from your FATHER because of that?

That is why I tell people submission is by CONVINCTION AND NOT BY EXPECTATION.

ALSO READ:-  10 THINGS MATURED SINGLE LADIES WHO ARE FINDING IT HARD TO GET MARRIED SHOULD QUICKLY CONSIDER - Bishop Irabor Wisdom.

Expectations will not always be met.

2. WHEN BY THE INSTRUCTION OR BODY LANGUAGE OF YOUR FATHER, YOU COMPLETELY CUT OFF FROM A BROTHER THAT HAD ISSUES WITH YOUR FATHER, AS A MARK OF RESPECT AND HONOUR FOR YOUR FATHER, ONLY TO WAKE UP ONE DAY TO SEE YOUR FATHER AND HIS PRODIGAL SON RELATING AGAIN:

This issue is very serious. 

Do you know THE ELDER BROTHER of the PRODIGAL SON DID NOT LOOK FOR HIS YOUNGER BROTHER, as a mark of ALLEGIANCE to his FATHER?. 

The same FATHER who ACCEPTED the PRODIGAL SON without first discussing with his ELDER SON. 

This matter can TEAR A FAMILY APART because MOST PRODIGAL SONS will come in and don’t want to relate with those who joined their FATHER TO AVOID HIM. 

My Advice to Fathers:
When people join you to avoid a Son that is DIS-HONOURING you or fighting you, NEVER MAKE PEACE behind them, it will INJURE INNOCENT HEARTS. 

In our Ministry, we have some of our Pastors who left, spoke against me and the Church, that has RECONNECTED BACK WITH ME. 

The moment it is obvious I want to start relating with them publicly, they MUST COME TO THE CHURCH AND PUBLICLY RECONNECT WITH EVERYONE who joined me in AVOIDING THEM, otherwise, I can’t lose people who stood with me because someone who left is trying to return.

The Father of the PRODIGAL SON took TIME TO EXPLAIN to the ELDEST SON, what was happening. 

He did not rebuke him for GETTING ANGRY. 

His reason for being ANGRY WAS NOT OUT OF PLACE, but that is what happens when you join FATHERS TO AVOID SONS. 

And to the ELDER BROTHERS OF THE HOUSE, ALWAYS KNOW THAT ONE DAY, the PRODIGAL SON must COME BACK HOME. 

Be VERY WISE in MANAGING THE SITUATION. 

There are Fathers in NIGERIA WHO DON’T RELATE because of this matter. 

You can TRACE THE REASON for them not RELATING WELL, to this issue. 

And TO YOU WHO CAME BACK, what do you EXPECT SONS TO DO? 

To JOIN you in FIGHTING AND DIS-HONOURING YOUR FATHER?

If you were in their SHOES you will also AVOID them.

3. WHEN YOU BELIEVE GOD HATES DIVORCE AND YOU HAVE ALSO PREACHED AGAINST IT, ONLY TO WAKE UP AND DISCOVER YOUR SPIRITUAL FATHER HAS GONE THROUGH A DIVORCE:

Not EVERY SON can SURVIVE THIS PHASE. 

Pray it doesn’t happen to your FATHER, if you are a person who have VALUE for ONE MARRIAGE.

I know a PASTOR who DIVORCED and most of his SONS LEFT, that a DIVORCEE CANNOT BE THEIR FATHER. 

ALSO READ:-  EVERY CHURCH MUST FIND A WAY TO MANAGE THESE FOUR GROUP OF RICH MEMBERS - Bishop Irabor Wisdom

They are not GENUINE SONS. 

To a GENUINE SON, it was not MARRIAGE I SUBMITTED to but to a MANTLE. 

Those who DISCONNECTED are not WRONG, and those who STAYED are not also WRONG. 

It is always a difficult moment for ALL SONS when their FATHER goes through A DIVORCE. 

SOME WOMEN will never stay in that church again. 

To them, ‘I don’t want my HUSBAND to be INFLUENCED WRONGLY’. 

SONS WHO CAN SURVIVE this difficult moment, are the REAL SONS.

4. WHEN AFTER YOU HAVE SOWN SO MUCH FINANCIALLY INTO THE LIFE OF YOUR SPIRITUAL FATHER, YOU RAN INTO A SERIOUS FINANCIAL CRISIS AND YOU APPROACHED HIM FOR LITTLE FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE TO ADD TO WHAT YOU HAVE IN ORDER TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM, ONLY FOR HIM TO OPEN THE BIBLE AND EDUCATE YOU ON HOW A SON SHOULD NOT ASK FOR HELP FROM HIS SPIRITUAL FATHER:

The truth is that not all SONS can SURVIVE this issue.

Biblically, it is not right to go to a FATHER for FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE.
You are to SOW into their LIVES and not the other way round. 

If they CHOOSE to HELP you, It is at their DISCRETION. 

But it is not a must they do that. 

I can BOLDLY say, all my MENTORS you know and my SPIRITUAL FATHER, not one of them have ever given me MONEY for ANY REASON. 

I have gone through all KINDS OF CHALLENGES in MINISTRY, I rather DIE EXERCISING MY FAITH than RUN to my FATHER and MENTORS for HELP. 

I have also discovered SONS that you ASSIST FINANCIALLY always don’t END WELL. 

They END UP MISBEHAVING. 

MENTORSHIP is not SPONSORSHIP. 

SONSHIP is not for SPONSORSHIP.

5) WHEN YOU FINISHED HOSTING HIM, IMMEDIATELY HE LEFT YOUR CHURCH, THE FOLLOWING WEEK YOU SAW HIS HANDBILLS IN TOWN THAT HE IS COMING TO OPEN A BRANCH IN THAT SAME CITY:

It is going to be a DIFFICULT moment for your SUBMISSION TO HIM, IF HE NEVER told you that he is COMING TO START A BRANCH. 

MOST FATHERS DON’T CONSIDER THEIR SON WHEN THEY ARE COMING TO OPEN A BRANCH OF CHURCH IN THE SAME CITY THEIR SON HAS HONOURED THEM. 

Nobody is saying you can’t START A BRANCH of your CHURCH, but ensure YOU DON’T TARGET your SON’S CHURCH. 

And to you the SON, you are not the OWNER of the CITY. 

Let him START THE CHURCH. 

No BRANCH PASTOR should THREATEN A FOUNDER. 

Even if he THREATENS YOU, ONE DAY he will be  TRANSFERRED OUT of that CITY. 

YOU JUST BE FOCUSED!

6) WHEN HIS PREACHING AND TEACHING IS COMPLETELY AGAINST THE STLYE OF MINISTRY YOU ARE CALLED INTO:

HE KNOWS you are a PROPHET who CALLS PEOPLE OUT and GIVE them PROPHECIES and also ENGAGE in DELIVERANCE PRAYERS and SPECIAL MINISTRATIONS, yet your FATHER will ALWAYS tell PEOPLE ‘ANY CHURCH you ATTEND and they CALL you OUT to TELL you, your LIFE HISTORY, IS NOT THE CHURCH OF GOD.

ALSO READ:-  THE PASTOR AND HIS PAINS - Irabor Wisdom

I don’t have much to say here. 

All I will say is, how can YOU SUBMIT TO A MAN WHOSE MINISTRY IS TO DESTROY YOUR MINISTRY?

IF WHAT GOD SENT YOU TO DO is what he is PREACHING AGAINST, it MEANS GOD HAS NOT SENT YOU TO SUBMIT TO HIM.

If the TOTALITY of his GOSPEL IS TO DESTROY YOUR MINISTRY, he is SENT AGAINST YOU and NOT FOR YOU.

RUN BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE.

ONE of the MARKS of a MATURED FATHER is the ABILITY TO MANAGE ALL KINDS OF SONS with all KINDS OF MINISTRIES, because YOU ARE NOT THE CALLER, GOD IS THE CALLER.

In NIGERIA FOR INSTANCE, there are CHURCHES THAT OPERATE FEET-WASHING AND BLOOD OF SPRINKLING, and THEY SUBMIT to CHURCHES that do not OPERATE with those MYSTERIES and they do not CONDEMN THEM.

There are those who also submit to the CHURCHES that OPERATE WITH THOSE MYSTERIES but they don’t do it in their own CHURCHES, because EVERYONE must OPERATE AS COMMANDED BY GOD and not as COMMANDED BY THEIR SPIRITUAL FATHER.

After all said and done, YOU WILL GIVE ACCOUNT TO YOUR CALLER and not to any MAN.

7) WHEN AFTER ALL YOU HAVE DONE FOR HIM TO TRUST YOU AS A FAITHFUL SON, HE STILL REFUSED TO TRUST YOU FOR A DEEPER RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM:.

There is nothing that is AS FRUSTRATING AS having a FATHER who does not want to TRUST you.

The more you try to prove your LOYALTY TO HIM, the more he EDGES YOU OUT of his INNER CIRCLE.

You may be DOING SOMETHING that gives him a REASON TO DOUBT YOU.

Don’t FORCE IT, TRUST MUST BE BUILT OVER TIME, it is not a ONE MONTH thing. 

If he DOES NOT TRUST YOU, NEVER ALLOW IT THREATEN the RELATIONSHIP.

Just CONNECT with GRACE and believe God for WHO WILL SHOW YOU the PRACTICALITY of their SUCCESS SECRETS.

EVERY SUCCESS HAS SECRETS.

It is ONLY A FATHER who TRUSTS YOU that will SHOW YOU the SECRET of their SUCCESS, as long as it IS PERSONAL TO THEM.

EVERYBODY CALLS IT GRACE but HOW THAT GRACE CAME TO FIND THEM, they WON’T TELL YOU.

UNTIL THEY TRUST YOU, THEY CAN’T ENTRUST IT TO YOU.

Thanks for reading.

Irabor Wisdom

Presiding Bishop
Answers’ Assembly Warri Delta State Nigeria.

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